Don't get mad, get even! Catknapper works hard on his garden

This sounds like a made up story, or a plot line from a daytime soap but according to the newspaper of troof, the Daily Mail, this is actually happening. The thing that staggers me about the cat mysteries of Bramley Crescent is not the sheer cheek of the avid gardener who is taking the animals but rather the imaginative names of the pets.

If I were a catknapper (which, for the record, I am not) I would steal cats on the basis of their shit names. Imagine how annoying it would be on a sunny day to be lazing in your garden only to hear your neighbour calling, "Puss Puss!" This does not sound like a pet, sounds like a mean infection. Tooty would cause similar irritation.

Is there no originality on Bramley Crescent? One of the cats is called 'Blackie' which unsurprisingly is the black cat at the bottom. I actually think this is a bit of a racist name for an animal. Why is it ok to call a cat Blackie but not a person of the Asian persuasion a Brownie?
I am intrigued by Spoon. What kind of behaviours must 'Spoon' possess to get such a name?

I'm gonna start a campaign just for the return of Spoon and Tooty. The others are probably better off with new owners who give them better names.
[source: Daily Mail]