Monday 5 November 2007

Heather Mills makes Sir Paul confess that she is nice

Ring, ring....Ring, ring
Sir Paul: Hello?
Dragon: (whimper)
Sir Paul: Hello?
Dragon: (heavy breathing)...hello.
Sir Paul: Heather? Is that You?
Dragon: Hello, Paul help, I need...
Sir Paul: I think you mean 'Sir' Paul.
Dragon: Yes, yes of course. Sorry Sir Paul, did you see me on TV?
Sir Paul: (sigh) Yes I saw your little outburst.
Dragon: They're on to me. I think they might know my 'secret'. If you could do one thing for me...
Sir Paul: £20 million is my final offer.
Dragon: (heavy breathing) one extra thing...Please tell them that I'm nice. I am nice, remember when I used to be nice to you? We had some good times, nice times. I was really nice, not crazy at all. I used to do charitable acts, and that's nice, right?
Sir Paul: What?
Dragon: So you'll tell them all that I'm a nice person? Not a golddigger. I'm nice. Not mad, insane or a fantasist. NICE.
Sir Paul: Well, if I thought you were that nice we wouldn't be getting divorced. Sorry but...
Dragon: TELL THEM I'M NICE OR I'M OPENING THE BOX.
Sir Paul: Box?
Dragon: YOU KNOW.
Sir Paul: Sorry Heather but I really must be going...
Dragon: YOU HAVE TO TELL THEM HOW NICE I AM!!

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